I've made it through almost two weeks at the office already. Hard to believe, right? I love seeing my friends here... but I miss my kids like crazy! It's difficult seeing them for just a few hours a day and then praying the weekend would come sooner. I'm sure we'll all adjust eventually. McKenna still is missing our Week O' Fun (see my last post) she asks me every morning, "what are we going to do today mommy?" with some expectancy in her voice. Sadly, I can't say we'll be going to the zoo or a museum any time soon.
I've been telling myself there's a greater purpose to what I do at work besides my job just taking time from my family. I get to help patients and other people here, and I get to show people the gift that I have in God. What a privilege that is! I can show other people all day long that there's something different about me, that I have a peace that can only be found in a relationship with Jesus. I can show people that being a Christian doesn't mean that I can't be fun to be around, or that they can't be themselves around me. I can choose to be an example, I can choose to be there for them, I can choose to listen and respond accordingly. I am really blessed to be here. I hope the people I work with feel blessed because of me... because that's my ultimate goal. I want them to know that I love them and that God loves them too. "By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another." -John 13:35
Keep praying for me people. I sure need it. I feel a lot of guilt about not staying home with my kids, and I know that's not from God. I feel a pressure from other people to conform to some idyllic image of what a mom should be, and I know that's not from God either. Please pray that I would be discerning, that I would make an impact where I am, and that I would follow God's lead... wherever that may be.
lindsay! thanks for sharing. you know, in the bible it never says moms must stay home. our culture/society adds much to our distress about this as well. you have to do what you have to do and know God knows your heart and will guide you in that. its like homeschooling vs. public schooling. it pains me daily to drop my boys off at the school but at this point I know I am doing the right thing for our family (and for my mental health :) ) it helps me to trust God with my boys even more. and like you say, we can be a light to the families/kids in their classrooms. hang in there because even though it will be hard everyday, it should get easier.
ReplyDeletepraying for you and your family :) and the picture of all the kids is an AMAZING show of God's faithfulness and life!
Fun pictures, Linds! Thanks for the update! And I will keep praying for you! You are such a great mom...don't ever forget that! Can't wait to see you in person soon :) MISS YOU!
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